GeekRoom.Tech
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
trashcan@sh.itjust.worksM to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works · 2 days ago

Man who gets winded climbing stairs describes plan to repel home invasion

www.thebeaverton.com

external-link
message-square
56
link
fedilink
305
external-link

Man who gets winded climbing stairs describes plan to repel home invasion

www.thebeaverton.com

trashcan@sh.itjust.worksM to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works · 2 days ago
message-square
56
link
fedilink
GEORGE, NB - Despite no self-defense training and being incredibly out of shape, cell phone kiosk employee Wade Creamer, 27, has often described to friends his plans for countering a potential home invasion.
  • Triumph@fedia.io
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    arrow-down
    7
    ·
    2 days ago

    Firearms are the great equalizer.

    • SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      28
      arrow-down
      10
      ·
      2 days ago

      Yeah it equalizes your chances of killing your family by mistake to roughly the same as a home invader killing them.

      • Triumph@fedia.io
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        arrow-down
        15
        ·
        2 days ago

        It’s more dangerous to have a swimming pool.

        • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          6
          ·
          2 days ago

          The risks of shooting your family with a swimming pool are amazingly small though.

          • Triumph@fedia.io
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            2 days ago

            I drown by gunfire every day.

        • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 day ago

          I remember now that this BS comes from freakonomics. The irony of that bastion of “contrarian thought” is that so many people seem to have lost their ability to think critically while reading it.

        • JoeyHarrington@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          19
          ·
          2 days ago

          Truth. The day my swimming pool started packing was the day I left home.

        • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          13
          arrow-down
          3
          ·
          edit-2
          2 days ago

          This is really only close to true statistically if you’re under 4, thank fuck America isn’t shooting many toddlers yet (but the number isn’t zero). There are about 1200 deaths a year in domestic pools in the US and 46000 gun deaths.

          • Triumph@fedia.io
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            2
            ·
            2 days ago

            https://poolfence.com/are-guns-more-dangerous-than-your-pool/

            • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              5
              ·
              2 days ago

              Yeah, obviously a company that sells pool safety products wants to emphasise pool safety (and I’m not trying to say pools aren’t dangerous BTW)

          • SupraMario@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            7
            arrow-down
            8
            ·
            2 days ago

            A) you’re way off…3500-4000 drown in the USA a year. We’ll call that accidents.

            B) accidental gun deaths per year are around 450-500…

            You wanna do statics, do them right and stop making shit up. Your anti-gun propaganda you drink has always had to make shit up to get people to believe their crap. No having a firearm in your home is not magically more deadly than owning a pool. Period.

            • corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              9
              arrow-down
              3
              ·
              2 days ago

              …3500-4000 drown in the USA a year. We’ll call that accidents.

              B) accidental gun deaths per year are around 450-500…

              Yeesh. Another gun-clutcher.

              Drowning deaths in America includes every kind of drowning death, and so lake and boating and surfing and oil rig and commercial fishing accidents pump that number up.

              You wanna do statics, do them right and stop making shit up.

              Hypocrisy is fun. And the word is statistics.

              • SupraMario@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                3
                arrow-down
                4
                ·
                2 days ago

                Yesh another anti gun nut who thinks that we should disarm ourselves while we have fascist in power…

                See my other comment as well to your other points.

                • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  4
                  arrow-down
                  2
                  ·
                  2 days ago

                  OK rambo, how many fascists have you shot so far…

                  • SupraMario@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    4
                    arrow-down
                    3
                    ·
                    2 days ago

                    Yes because that’s what you go right to. Shooting people and potentially starting a civil war. Glad you’re anti-gun…cause you clearly seem to be off.

            • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              4
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              edit-2
              1 day ago

              A) includes drownings in bathtubs an natural water (where majority of drownings happen) B) so people who died to domestic violence or suicide are safe are they?

              “You wanna do statics, do them right and stop making shit up.”

              Source for majority of drowning deaths non-pool related: https://www.statista.com/chart/34873/rates-of-unintentional-drowning-deaths-and-drowning-locations/?srsltid=AfmBOoreeroH378wf2OA0D3nU9ZbuMfzFgmO1VcicvcFUwRF2G1scUA_

              Source for actual total gun deaths, because danger doesn’t just mean accidents: https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2025/03/05/what-the-data-says-about-gun-deaths-in-the-us/

              • SupraMario@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                3
                arrow-down
                3
                ·
                2 days ago

                Suicide isn’t an accident and neither is domestic violence. You don’t accidentally off yourself and you can’t accidentally have domestic violence. You also can’t suicide via water either…well not without a ton of work.

                You’re bullshit stat is about how having a gun magically makes you more likely to be a victim of gun violence, which is not correct.

                • julietOscarEcho@sh.itjust.works
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  3
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  2 days ago

                  https://academic.oup.com/aje/article-abstract/160/10/929/140858

                  Why do you keep talking about “magic” and “accidents”. Just because you don’t want deadly weapons to be a risk factor doesn’t mean that they aren’t. It’s just a fact. And an obvious and intuitive one at that.

                  • SupraMario@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    arrow-down
                    1
                    ·
                    2 days ago

                    Because the point is that drowning is mainly via an accident. You don’t accidentally suicide yourself. And your link is really “no shit” stats. You can’t kill yourself and be in the “suicide with a firearm” if you don’t use a fucking firearm. These are “water is wet” stats that are pointless.

            • Rekorse@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              4
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              2 days ago

              The fun thing about statistics is they dont apply to single individuals.

        • SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          edit-2
          2 days ago

          I’m not talking about swimming pools I’m talking about the risks of shooting your family while trying to protect them being larger then the infinitesimal chance that you might John Wick some home invaders and save the day.

        • Valmond@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          6
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          2 days ago

          It’s more dangerous to be moron.

    • isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      2 days ago

      “God created men, Colt made them equal”

    • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      2 days ago

      Only if you know how to use them and practice regularly. And even then …

The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works

theonion@sh.itjust.works

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: [email protected]

For posting satire from The Onion and other similar sources.

redundancy, but not for its own sake


Be nice. All instance rules apply.


Rules:

  • Be respectful. Everyone should feel welcome here.
  • No bigotry - including racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, or xenophobia.
  • No Ads / Spamming.
  • No pornography.

Règles :

  • Soyez respectueux. Tout le monde doit se sentir le bienvenu ici.
  • Pas de bigoterie - y compris le racisme, le sexisme, le capacitisme, l’homophobie, la transphobie ou la xénophobie.
  • Pas de publicités / Pas de spam.
  • Pas de pornographie.
Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 314 users / day
  • 977 users / week
  • 1.49K users / month
  • 6.37K users / 6 months
  • 1 local subscriber
  • 1.65K subscribers
  • 577 Posts
  • 1.76K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • trashcan@sh.itjust.works
  • BE: 0.19.11
  • Modlog
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org