I hope you have some sort of therapist to talk to, because this is… gonna take some work.
Forget the “why”. Being there and saving the life of people directly connected to you is traumatic. Full stop. PTSD? I mean, maybe not, but trauma? yes.
There’s a lot going on here, and the only reasonable response is advice. You need advisement. You also need to settle the “why”. Why the rest of the family isn’t concerned? If it’s “normal” there’s a normalization aspect that needs investigation. Why you have had to do the Heimlich on multiple family members? That speaks to it being something specific about your family. Why is it YOU who’s doing it?
Exactly none of this is normal. Yes, you are having the natural reaction to having family almost dying in front of you. You need to figure out the rest. The other symptoms will either make sense, or go away, if you settle the rest.
I hope you have some sort of therapist to talk to, because this is… gonna take some work.
Forget the “why”. Being there and saving the life of people directly connected to you is traumatic. Full stop. PTSD? I mean, maybe not, but trauma? yes.
There’s a lot going on here, and the only reasonable response is advice. You need advisement. You also need to settle the “why”. Why the rest of the family isn’t concerned? If it’s “normal” there’s a normalization aspect that needs investigation. Why you have had to do the Heimlich on multiple family members? That speaks to it being something specific about your family. Why is it YOU who’s doing it?
Exactly none of this is normal. Yes, you are having the natural reaction to having family almost dying in front of you. You need to figure out the rest. The other symptoms will either make sense, or go away, if you settle the rest.