I’m sorry, if you’re growing cherries, fucking expensive ass cherries, and can’t stay afloat without almost a half million dollars of welfare, then what the fuck are you even doing? I don’t fully agree with it, but I at least understand the importance of giving welfare to people growing crops we actually need, but frivolous shit like cherries? What a waste. If we’re paying almost a half million dollars in taxes to give you cherry welfare, those cherries better be free or close to it.

I’m super jealous because I’ve wanted to have Canadian citizenship since back in my late teens / early adulthood when I realized that there was already a version of America that actually lived up to American ideals and which offered same-sex marriage as well as universal healthcare. That weed and apparently codeine are legal there make it so much more bittersweet.

The only people I’ve known personally to get citizenship are those who married a Canadian citizen. Which sucks for me because I’m already happily partnered and there’s no way I’d give that up for anything, not even Canadian citizenship, awesome and appealing as it is.

I’ll never have biological children of my own and I’ll never get to use that benefit. From a strictly selfish standpoint, it stings a bit that pretty much all my heterosexual friends and coworkers, male and female, get a minimum of 12 - 36 weeks of paid time off that I’ll never get.

Having said that, I’m genuinely happy that they get it, I think it’s a shame that 12 weeks per child isn’t a minimum standard for paternity & maternity leave. In the professional settings I’ve worked in that offer paternity leave, I’ve never experienced a coworker complaining or making fun of a man taking paternity leave, nor have I ever heard of a man NOT taking paternity leave when it’s offered.

The places I’ve worked that offer it also usually offer flexible leave, so it’s very common for new dads to take 4 - 6 weeks off at birth, and then work a reduced schedule for the remaining time until they’re out of leave, after which they return full time. Even some of the moms are doing that as well, basically maximizing the amount of time that at least one parent is on leave and at home with the newborn.

But, outside of professional settings and particularly within conservative/Republican family and acquaintances, typically lower-to-middle class people, they act like paternity leave is ridiculous. My dad laughed out loud a while back when I mentioned I was taking over a new project because my coworker was about to go on paternity leave “What? Are you serious?” In my opinion, “toxic masculinity” aka stupid, ignorant, and useless concepts of overly rigid gender stereotypes is where this type of opinion is rooted. That and probably a good degree of jealousy.